Another Smackdown Recap

I didn’t realize that Matt was also doing a recap at the same time but here’s my thoughts enhances with GIFs.

Maryse starts off SD. Introduces Miz. Gross kissing. Ryder comes out.

“I would watch a show on the network on these guys going to their waxing appointments.” – Michele

Ryder vs Corbin

I love Mauro’s enthusiasm and calling all the moves.

End of days and pinfall from Corbin. Post match beat down interrupted by Dolph. Why no enzuguri Dolph?  Corbin runs away.  It looks like we might have a pre show match for Payback between Dolph and Corbin?  It could be good.

Owens and Renee are the best. Michele ships them. Owens implies he’s going to interrupt the main event. I would be surprised if that doesn’t happen.

Dana Brooke not included.

Ooo. Paige and Emma up next!

Paige entered during the commercial.  I hope she gets another run at it.  According to the reddit user Falcon Arrow (may he rest in peace), it was suggested that Paige be Sister Abigail.  I would have marked out for that.  Emma’s entrance attire is ridiculous. Those gloves.  Nasty turnbuckle to head bump to Paige. Maybe I’m just worried with Paige’s recent concussion.  Emma is running this match.

King has something against kangaroos. I think they killed his first wife.

Another head to turnbuckle and pin. Is this a work?  Paige signaled for the ref.

Next a weird USA/roman reigns promo?  I’m confused.  How does this help Reigns or USA Network?  I guess it’s to try to convince non-fans to watch to see Roman’s dashing good looks?

Jesus King, can your shirt be any more bedazzled?

Raw rebound time.  I can actually hear what Roman said!  The accoustics at the Staples Center suck.

Enzo and Cass time.  I love Enzo’s how you doin’ dance.  The babe Ruth of beat downs. The Michael Jordan of jargon.   We have 1001 things we can say about our opponents but the worst thing we could say is you’re the Ascension. Ouch. That’s harsh.

I don’t think I’ve ever seen the Ascension actually work in the ring. They don’t seem that bad.  Why do we have to watch the Usos all the time? Cass hits the Bossman Slam. Awesome tribute. Rocket launcher for the win.

AJ Styles has an interview with Jojo. Is AJ on an apple box?  Is she really that short?  I think it’s a work.  El Patron with a weird cut for his shirt.  Apparently Del Rio/Styles is an ROH dream match for some people.  Let’s see if it delivers.

AJ’s entrance is so cool.  Apparently Ali had his second loss in this arena.  Mauro has a lot of info to drop about this weird SD arena.  Whoa.  I just realized SD is in SD.  Mind Blown.

“Sigh, you sure have a lot of useless information.” I love heel Lawler.  He’s the best.  Lots of holds in this match.

Come back from commercial in a headlock.  Some nice sequences in this match. It’s a shame this was just thrown together.  I feel like you could have built to this or mixed up having Styles in an endless series with Jericho.  Whoa. Terrible bump.  AJ gets dropped on his neck.  AJ is going to need to do a bit of DDP yoga to recover from that.

Golddust giving r-truth the cold shoulder. Wait? Goldango?  This is awkward.  Their commitment to not paying off the Golden Truth is kind of amazing.  It went from Funny to annoying and kind of back to funny.

Vaudevillians.  Whoa tweaked music. More villainous.  I like it.  They’re still going to have to work hard to get over.  The mainstream WWE crowd isn’t really buying it.

Shattered dreams gold dust entrance!  I miss this.  Everyone doing the Golddango!

That was quick work. Fandango ate the pin, of course.

And we are back with the main event of Zayn vs. Jericho.  I’m actually surprised that Jericho is sticking around at the top of the card like he is.  Weird Hayley’s comet reference from Jericho.  Also I love it when heels tear apart a town.

“Have you read anything about why Zayn comes out dressed like a cab driver?” – Michele

Michele and I were close to the stage at Raw on Monday. We almost had a heart attack when the pyro went off.

“San Diego really is a dump, you know.” – King

No surprise, KO interrupts the match. And now Ambrose?  Ambrose is handing out flyers for the Ambrose Asylum.

This five man team is madness.  Ambrose and Owens on commentary is always great.  Owens ribbing Saxton is always great.

Zayn puts on some great matches.  It’s exciting that he’s on the main roster and making a big impact.

Jericho goes after Ambrose and Zayn throws Jericho onto Owens.  Interference by Owens to end the match in DQ.

That’s it.  Another stream of consciousness Smackdown recap in the books!