The One With the Ambulance Match – A WWE Raw Great Balls of Fire Recap and Reactions

Tonight’s WWE Raw PPV came to you from the American Airlines Center in Dallas, Texas

As the title suggests, this PPV will be remembered as the one where Braun Strowman and Roman Reigns had the Ambulance Match that went haywire.   Fair warning: I was building an Ikea dresser while watching this PPV.  It was a very frustrating experience, much like this PPV at times.

The Ambulance Match

Braun Strowman may be WWE’s greatest creation in this decade.  I think it’s a combination of accidental booking and Adam Scherr’s sheer talent and look.

It was as hard-hitting as you can imagine.  I loved it so much that I’d recommend someone getting a free trial just to watch this match.  Let’s just skip straight to the finish.  With the doors open Braun moves out of the way just in time to avoid Roman’s attempt to spear him into the ambulance.  Basically, Roman loses the match all on his own as he dives into the back of the ambulance.  It was a cartoon ending.

In Braun’s celebration, he doesn’t notice Roman crawling back out of the ambulance.  He attacks Braun and actually gets him in the back of the vehicle.

What comes next is brilliance.

After throwing the driver out of the cab, Roman drives the ambulance out of the arena into the back.  He sits and thinks for a moment before putting the vehicle in reverse and slams the back of the vehicle into a trailer.

Roman stumbles away as a flabbergasted GM Angle looks on.  Some WWE personnel attempt to get the door open but call the authorities.

Meanwhile in the ring, we get a random Curt Hawkins Vs. Heath Slater match.  Slater easily defeats Hawkins.

Firemen have arrived with the Jaws of Life.  They get Braun out.  He’s covered in blood and refuses any kind of medical attention.  He just stumbles off into the night wanting to be left alone.

I’M INVESTED IN THIS STORY.

How does this affect either of their plans for Summerslam?  I want to know.  Is Roman a bad guy?  What a strange world we live in.

The Beast Persists

I’ll just say it.  I hate building Ikea furniture.  I’d like to do the Muscle Buster to this dresser.

I also didn’t really like this match.

It started great.  Joe attacked Brock before the match even begun and put Brock through one of the announce tables.  When Brock came to, he said he was good to go, despite looking like he didn’t really know where he was.

Joe controlled the match early on but soon visited Suplex City.  Joe was able to lock in the Coquina Clutch a few times but Brock was able to grab the ropes or slip out each time.

At one point, Brock gets Joe up for an F5 and Joe slips out into a Coquina Clutch.  It was super smooth.

But it didn’t matter.  Brock got him with one F5 and it was over.  ONE. STUPID.  F5.  Joe, and the build, deserve better than that.

Brock did look back at the ring to acknowledge that it was a lot harder than he expected it to be.

I just hope there are good plans for Joe going forward.

Here’s my progress building the dresser:

Everything Else

• Bray Wyatt defeated Seth Rollins following an eye rake for a dirty win.  I’m surprised that they let the 2K18 Cover star lose, even from dirty tactics.
• Neville defeats Tozawa after he was crotched on the top ropes.  It was a really, really excellent match with one of the crispest dives I’ve seen in a long time.  Akira’s dive is a thing of beauty.  I would have much rather a well-meaning Titus causing Tozawa to lose the match.
  • There might still be time.  Tozawa is demanding that Titus get him a rematch.
• Ikea furniture is so terrible but I’d love to watch a Network Show where WWE superstars have to build Ikea furniture for an hour.
• Alexa Bliss drew a count-out loss to Sasha Banks to retain the title.  Sasha wasn’t too happy about it and attacked Bliss on the stage, ultimately ending things with the double-knee.
• Enzo Amore gives another incredible promo before his match with Big Cass.  Unfortunately, the match wasn’t good.  I was hoping for something from Enzo.  Logically, Big Cass would kill Enzo, but I was hoping that his fire would save it.  It was successful though.  Cass has a lot of heat for it.  I’m just worried what they’re going to do with Enzo.
  • Big Cass has new music.
• Sheamus and Cesaro defeat The Hardy Boyz 4 falls to 3.  This was a fine, hard-hitting match.  I got a splinter building this damn dresser.  Meanwhile for Matt Hardy…

• The Miz retains the Intercontinental Championship against Dean Ambrose after a bunch of interference by The Miztourage and Maryse.  I mean, you knew it would happen, right?  I knew building a Tärva was going to suck too.
  • Bo and Curtis are great in Raw Talk afterwards.  All the reasons why Miz chose them and why they’d agree are really sound.  They’re 3rd generation Superstars who the WWE rarely uses.

Fire the Editors

The biggest problem with this PPV is that the editors were so damn good.  It’s hard for any match to live up to the hype that these guys build.  The solution is to fire the editors and replace them with people that aren’t nearly as good.

WWE, I’m available.

This PPV will be remembered for that Ambulance match and what happened after.  It was incredible.

And if you’re wondering, I finished building that dresser.