Breaking the 4th Wall – A Raw Recap

Tonight’s Raw comes to us from The FedEx Forum in Memphis, TN.  Booker T, a Houston resident, is riding out the storm with him family.  Since we are in Memphis, Jerry “The King” Lawler is back on commentary.

Women’s Diva’s Revolution

The Women’s Revolution is dead.  Long live the Diva’s Revolution.

Alexa claimed that she’d expose Sasha for exactly what she is, a legit loser.

And guess what, she did.  It was the wrong decision.  Sasha has never had a successful title defense in any of her reigns.

Shortly after the defeat, Nia Jax came out to congratulate Alexa only to drop her and turn on her.  It looks like Jax is next in line.

Don’t get me wrong, I love Alexa.  However, now all the women in the title picture are all a part of the new season of Total Divas, something that the Four Horsewoman decided was beneath them.  It seems suspect that creative is booking them in ways that are keeping them out of the title picture or just making them look bad.

I don’t like it.  Hopefully they correct this and we have the Four Horsewomen of the WWE Vs. the Four Horsewomen of the MMA at Survivor Series.  Wresltemania might be too long.  They might kill the credibility of the WWE women way before then.

Respect…

…is the only word that The Miz got out of his mouth before Angle showed up to announce a battle royale match to determine the #1 contender for his Intercontinental Champion next week on Raw.

I always view battle royales to be a lazy form of wrestling storytelling, the exception being The Royal Rumble.  Here are some notable moments:

• The Big Show is the first entrant.  He shaved his beard and looks rather…phallic.
• Curt Hawkins immediately posed as soon as the bell rung.  The other 14 combantants joined together to throw him out as the first elimination.
• Jason Jordan looked strong here.  He eliminated Axel and Dallas at the same time, then Elias.
• That left just Jeff Hardy and Jordan.  Hardy took advantage of Jordan being off balance to eliminate him to become your new #1 contender.

If they can’t get the Broken stuff together, I support a Jeff Hardy singles run in the meantime.  Good luck Jeff!

Breaking the 4th Wall

I could recap the contract signing but that would really do it injustice.  You really just need to watch it.

The promo was brutal.  A lot of people are celebrating it but I just see Cena being a dick here.  It actually maybe the turning point for me joining the Roman Empire (ugh kill me)

Sure, Roman’s performance was a little uneven.  At first, he was just following the script like he normally does.  After stumbling a bit and with a few adlibs from Cena, I believe he really was frustrated with Cena, especially after Cena pounced on him after he stumbled on a couple of words.

I don’t really know who’s the face and the heel here, but I’m all in on Roman.  According to the internet, I’m the only one.  To me, I saw some real humanity from Roman here.  I see the potential that’s buried (no pun intended) under so much careful management by people that really don’t understand what we want.

I don’t like bullies.  And deserved or not, Cena was a bully here.

For some reason, The Good Brothers thought that it would be an easy win to fight a Cena and Reigns tag team.  Angle made the match.  Gallows and Anderson were wrong.  They received a AA and Spear combo with Reigns getting the pin on Karl for the win.  There’s no reason that Roman and John should have one this match against former IWGP tag team champions.  This was a bad call by creative.

Everything Else

• Paul Heyman and Brock are out to basically recap what happened last week.  I’ve realized that it’s exactly what Paul’s promos are good for: catching up the Brock fans on who he’s facing next.  No need to watch the rest of Raw, just listen to Heyman wax poetic about a Monster that wants to slay the beast.  Brock Lesnar, however, actually takes the mic and warns Braun that he’s taking him to “Suplex City, Bitch!”
• Rollins met Cesaro in singles action.
  • Cesaro rolls up Rollins after a uppercut after Seth got distracted by Sheamus and Ambrose brawling on the outside.
• Not to be outdone, Ambrose and Sheamus immediately have a singles match of their own.  Sheamus works on Dean’s back, even pulling out a submission manuever I’ve never seen before, the Stretch Muffler.
  • Rollins returns the favor.  He enters the ring followed by Cesaro.  The ref stops and argues with Cesaro.  Meanwhile, Seth hits a flying knee on Sheamus and hits a dive on Cesaro.  Dean uses all that distraction and hits a Dirty Deeds on a weakened Sheamus for the win.  I suspect we are getting a Tag Title rematch at No Mercy.
• Emma and Mickie James have a war over who can hashtag something.  Emma is able to roll up James for the win.  She’s not helping my arguement at the top of the post.
  • Her new theme song is terrible.  CFO$ was quick to distance themselves from it.

• Elias defeats Pelvis Wesley from Southpaw Regional Wrestling because…I don’t know.  We already broke the fourth wall, why stop there?
• Enzo defeats Noam Dar, or Gnome Dar as Enzo pronounces it.  Wasn’t a great match.  Neville was unimpressed with the “weasel.”