Woken – A Raw Recap for December 4, 2017

Tonight’s Raw comes to us from the Staples Center in Los Angeles.

Michele and I are normally at Raw when it comes to Los Angeles.  We opted out of going to this one.  We felt a little burned after spending $150 a ticket for No Mercy a few months ago. So I’m purely going to grade this show based off whether I regret going or not.

WONDERFUL!!!!

• After giving the Zo Train a verbal lashing/motivational speech after losing to Rich Swann and crew last week, Nia Jax confronts Enzo with a creepy smile and a question.  “How you doing?”  What?!?!  That was all of it but still…
• Matt Hardy is WOKEN!  Sure, it’s only a video, but I wish I could have been in the crowd to cheer as loud as I could.  Calling Bray the “Consumer of Terrestial Entities” was a nice touch.

• Dean and Seth had their rematch with The Bar for the Raw Tag Titles in the main event.  It was an excellent match, with Seth taking a majority of the punishment.  He eventually hits the hot tag to Dean where he turns the match around.  Sheamus eventually has enough of watching Cesaro get wailed on.  He storms the ring and beats down Dean drawing a disqualification.  Dean and Seth win but The bar retains the titles.
• Kurt shows up.  They aren’t getting off so easy.  He’s restarting the match with No DQ rules.  Dean and Seth immediately dive out of the ring onto a celebratory Sheamus and Cesaro.  It looked like it was all going to go Dean and Seth’s way with a Dirty Deeds and Frog Splash combo, but Samoa Joe ruins it.  Samoa Joe might seem like an odd choice but it will make more sense when you get to the “DELETE! DELETE! DELETE!” category.  Roman shows up to even the score but in all the commotion Sheamus hits Dean with a Brogue Kick and Cesaro gets the pin.  Looks like we are getting The Shield Vs. The Bar +Samoa Joe.  I’ll buy that for a dollar.
  • Post show: The Shield beat the shit out of Sheamus for 15 minutes.  You have to leave the fans happy.

A Twing of Regret

• It would have been nice to see Paige in action against Sasha.  Paige had Absolution in tow.  Sasha had the Hugger and Mickie James.  Sasha took a couple bad bumps in the match.  Overall, it was good.  Eventually, all the ladies on the outside went at it clearing the way for Paige to win with the RamPaige.
• Asuka defeats Alicia Fox with an arm bar.  Absolution showed up again.  Asuka and the new trio had another staredown.  Paige is clearly Asuka’s next major challenger.  After Asuka left, Paige confronted Alicia.  Foxy was her only friend when she was here last.  And because of that, the beatdown was only a 2-on-1 instead of a 3-on-1.  How nice.
• Finn Bálor defeated Bo Dallas.  That’s a thing that happened.  It’s only in this category since I wish I was there to cheer for Finn to show Vince how OVER he is.  The LA crowd did a pretty good job in my absence.
• Gulak Vs. Alexander Vs. Tony Abs Vs. Ali to determine who faces Rich Swann for the #1 Contender position for the Cruiserweight Championship.

DELETE! DELETE! DELETE!

• It seems like Matt’s prediction that it would be three hours of Jason Jordan whining wasn’t that far off.
  • Kurt was all about to announce someone else to face Roman Reigns but Jordan shows up to beg for a match against Roman Reigns.  Kurt is pissed and that clearly wasn’t who he had in mind.
  • Roman shows up.  Everyone is booing Jordan and cheering the same terrible insults Roman normally doles out.  Maybe burying Jordan is all part of Vince’s master plan to get Roman over.
  • Jordan complains that Roman has had everything handed to him.  Roman disagrees.  He’s been there day in and day out.  He tells Jason that if he wants a title shot he has to take it, not ask for it.
  • Roman wants Joe after being choked out last week.  Joe shows up to warn Roman to back down.  Jason hits Roman with a German suplex when Roman’s back is turned.  Roman is pissed and asks Kurt to make the match.
  • The match was fine.  It went 25+ minutes but it won’t end up on any “best of” lists.
  • Joe tried to attack Roman after the match but Jordan suplexed him.  He received a Superman Punch for his efforts.
  • Jordan demanded another rematch with Roman next week.  Kurt wasn’t having it but was ok with giving him a match with Joe later that night.  Joe decided to attack Jason moments later, sparing us from that terribleness.
• Kurt Angle promised a challenge for Elias, who thought he was just giving a concert for the good people of Los Angeles.  His eloquent performance was interrupted by none other than Braun Strowman.  Normally either Elias or Braun Strowman would be enough to get this in the “Twing of Regret” category.  Kane’s appearance, however, relegates this to this category.  I’m so over Kane.

Overall, I’m not crushed I didn’t go.  The best parts didn’t happen in the ring.  And the parts that did, I basically already saw at No Mercy.

Grade: B-