Extreme Predictions for Extreme Rules

Tonight’s PPV comes from Pittsburgh, PA.  Let’s just get right to it.  It’s just me this month.  Matt is on assignment.

The Kickoff Show

Sin Cara vs. Andrade “Cien” Almas

I expect this match to be excellent.  It’s a shame that this match is in the kickoff but it’s probably because, just like the New Day Vs. SaNiTy match, there’s absolutely zero build.  That being said, I expect Almas to pick up the win here.

The New Day vs. SAnitY (Tables Match)

The biggest prediction I have for this whole post is that this match will steal the show.  I’m normally fine skipping the kickoff but there’s no way I’m going to miss this.  In the end, I expect SAnitY to win this one, with Eric Young putting Kofi through a table.

The Main (Ridiculously Long for a B-Show) Card

I guess they were serious about these shows going longer.  They probably should have trimmed a few of these matches.

Finn Bálor vs. “Constable” Baron Corbin

I always want Bálor to win but I think it does more for a story here if Corbin wins.  Honestly though, this match should just take place on an episode of Raw.  It doesn’t seem important enough to happen here.  Plus there’s no EXTREME gimmick, so what’s the point.  Corbin with an End of Days.

Raw Tag Team Champions “Woken” Matt Hardy & Bray Wyatt vs. The B-Team

I’ve been watching the Hulu edit the last couple of weeks so I haven’t even seen any of these guys.  I feel like Matt and Bray are going to retain.  I have no solid reasons for believing that.  Talk to me when this match takes place on the Hardy Compound and then I’ll be interested.  Bray hits a Sister Abigail on Bo.

SmackDown Women’s Champion Carmella vs. Asuka (with James Ellsworth suspended above the ring in a Shark Cage)

So am I the only person that thinks that they’re just going to recycle the Enzo moment and have Ellsworth slip out of the age and fall below to help Carmella?  I hope they don’t but I have a weird feeling about it.  Despite what should be an easy match for Asuka and she should be the Women’s Champion, I have a feeling that Carmella is going to retain.  If James doesn’t slip out, she’ll win through some sort of shady maneuver.

Raw Women’s Champion Alexa Bliss vs. Nia Jax (Extreme Rules Match)

One thing I can predict is Ronda is most definitely jumping out of her seat and beating down Alexa.  Here’s what’s going to happen: since it’s an extreme rules match, Ronda will get a chair, miss Alexa, and accidentally hit Nia.  That will allow Alexa to retain.

United States Champion Jeff Hardy vs Shinsuke Nakamura

With reports that Jeff has been pulling back from doing the Swanton Bomb, I feel like he might be pulling back the intensity of his schedule just a bit too.  Part of that involves dropping the US Championship.  Nakamura, on the other hand, needs a championship to be fully effective as this heel character.  Nakamura hits him with a brutal knee for the win.

Intercontinental Champion Dolph Ziggler vs. Seth Rollins (30-Minute WWE Iron Man Match)

You really can’t go wrong with either of these guys winning this match.  I know both of these guys could go double this length and probably tell an amazing story, but then the card will be 136 hours long.  Either this match or AJ & Rusev should main event.  I have a funny feeling that it’ll be Roman & Bob, but I hope I’m wrong.  Back to this match, I think it’ll be 3-2 pinfalls with Ziggler retaining.  Drew will help with one of those decisions about mid way through.

SmackDown Tag Team Champions The Bludgeon Brothers vs. Team Hell No

This is either an easy win for the Team Hell No or they’re immediately breaking them up.  It probably has more to do with Glen’s schedule running for mayor than anything else.  If I’m protecting the business, I’d say that Team Hell No will overcome the Hammer Husbands (thanks Marty and Sara Love Wrestling for the perfect nickname).

Braun Strowman vs Kevin Owens (Steel Cage Match)

Strowman.  This match will be entertaining but I don’t really expect any other result.

Roman Reigns vs. Bobby Lashley

What about Bob?  I hope for their sake that this isn’t the main event.  People are going to be pissed off if that happens.  I kind of feel like Lashley is going to win just to throw people off.  Their brawl on Monday did a lot to help this match but it’s not really enough to make me care.  I hope they prove me wrong tonight.  Bob wins with whatever his finisher is.

WWE Champion AJ Styles vs. Rusev

AJ has had a long run as champion but Rusev deserves some sort of championship.  He’s good in the ring, great on the microphone, and just a charming guy you’d want to visit morning TV shows.  Actually, let’s just talk about morning TV.  How great would it be for Aiden English and Rusev to just travel the country doing morning TV?  If Rusev doesn’t win the championship, I have a new idea for a WWE Network show.  My mind says AJ, but my heart says Rusev.

Final Extreme Predictions

Drew McIntyre will pull a Scooby Doo and pull off his face to reveal that he was always old man Dean Ambrose the whole time.  Think about it, have we ever seen Dean and Drew in the same place at the same time?  He’s also in a full body suit, which explains the size difference.

Ok.  I really just want Dean back.  I know the booking for WWE has been terrible for the last few months but it also seemed to coincide with Dean going away.  Maybe I just need him around to tolerate the terrible booking?